Heidi Klum jeans. Heidi Klum dressed like an angst teen from the mid '90s while running errands in Hollywood on Sunday and I don't know whether to laugh, cry, or take a torch to her insured legs and burn those hideous pants right off her. The supermodel usually looks stunning no matter what she wears, but this pair of extremely flared jeans might be her worst look ever. They're so wide in the leg that Heidi probably has yet to realize that there's a homeless person or five living in the folds of her god awful pants, snacking on cupcakes her kids are sneaking them.


I think it's time we all agree to agree that flare jeans are done. They had their moment in the '70s and a resurgence in the '90s but please, it's time to let them die. They are a D.N.R. trend that should never see the light of day on anyone's legs, let alone on the stems of one of the most famous women in the world.

The only reason, the only reason I can think of why Heidi would wear such a horrifying "style" is because she's been criticized recently for being too thin. Maybe her skinny jeans looked loose on her and she wanted to hide her bony legs under thousands of pounds of denim fabric. I've seen some women around town whose leggings are baggy, and when that happens it's usually a sign of a problem, so perhaps Heidi was trying to avoid any speculation about her shrinking figure by donning these horrific jeans.

Who knows what her motives were, but lord knows those flare jeans weren't the answer. And poor little Leni, she had to be seen out and about with her mom in those pants. How embarrassing. Suri Cruise is probably laughing her ass off about this right now, counting her blessings that Katie would never, ever be such a fashion failure.

Heidi's flop may not be for naught, though ... hopefully thousands of women across the country are organizing Flare Up parties, where they'll burn their wide leg jeans in ceremonial backyard fires. The time to align is now, ladies. Embrace the skinny jeans and denounce the flares.